Gratitude at the David Hoffmeister ACIM Monastery
I want to thank Jason, and everyone at the Monastery again for welcoming me with such openness. I’m still amazed that I was granted this opportunity to see shining types of the teachings of a course in miracles acim, and fo the first time in a lengthy while, I don’t feel alone.
Section of me wanted to remain longer, but beneath that desire was thinking that I would be doing so for the incorrect reason; as an easy way to prevent my problems. The stronger feeling was, and is, that my travels will continue.
Before I left, Jason asked if I had had any insights. What I’m about to share was not yet clear in those days; only on the drive away made it happen coalesce.
That morning, several lines from the Vance Joy song kept running through my head, “I never needs to have told you, never needs to have let you see inside. Don’t want it troubling the mind, won’t you allow it to be?” This confused me as I possibly could not think of whatever I had said that I felt regret for.
Eventually, the phrase, “don’t want it troubling your mind” stood out. This reminded me that probably the most prominent fear I had in coming to the Monastery was that I’d somehow interfere having its residents’reassurance, simply by my presence alone. This belief that I possibly could negatively affect other people’s state of mind has been with me for many years, and has colored many of my past experiences and relationships.
This fear left my awareness right after I arrived. On the drive away it rose again, but I remembered David saying in one of his videos that minds cannot attack. I cried and laughed, and now feel like the belief will be (has been?) released.
There are other things that happened that felt important, but I can’t think of them right now.